I have a question plzzzzzz answerrrrr
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BandGeek22
Bracelet King
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4 years, 5 months ago by BandGeek22
So I have just been thinking bc well there is nothing else to do lol but when you ALWAYS text first what does it mean? I ALWAYS text first and start conversations with my bestie and I know she loves me and I love her we always have an amazing time, but I can’t help thinking I did something wrong bc she never texts me I know she isn’t a toxic friend she does SOOOO much for me and loves me I just... I keep thinking. I wasn’t sure if anyone out there just doesn’t like text and that’s why or if there is actually something wrong 🙁
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BandGeek22
Bracelet King
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4 years, 5 months ago by BandGeek22
I mean we have been friends for 2 years and are VERY close she is practically a sister yet she never texts and with quarantine it’s like I’m losing her 😭
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madeleine_
Moderator
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4 years, 5 months ago by madeleine_
I’m sorry this is happening to you, it sounds tough. You guys might have a different idea of how often you like to text. Like if she wants to text every two days or so but you want to text every day (nothing wrong with that btw) then it makes sense that she wouldn’t text first. She also might just not like to text. I know that I really struggle to have a real conversation over text, so I tend not to text people even if I would love to talk to them. I recommend talking to your friend about this and telling her how it’s making you feel. I really doubt that she’s doing this on purpose, and she probably has no idea that it’s making you so upset. Sorry this turned out so long haha, but good luck and let me know how it turns out (either on here or in a message)
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BandGeek22
Bracelet King
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4 years, 5 months ago by BandGeek22
@madeleine_ yeah true I did not text for about 2 days to see what would happen and I just couldn’t take not talking so I texted 😂 ok thx ☺️
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m3rmaidv
Professional
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4 years, 5 months ago by m3rmaidv
Now I know that I know nothing about her, but there could be more reasonable reasons why she doesn't usually text first. For me, I'm someone who doesn't often text first, and it's not because I don't care, but I just don't like texting in general and I'd much rather interact face-to-face, so I don't feel inclined to text people. I also often feel like I don't have anything to talk about, and I don't really initiate conversation unless I have something that I want to talk about. I'm someone who keeps more to myself. I also feel depressed sometimes and don't feel like talking to anyone at all.Bottom line is, I know that I'm a terrible texter and I feel bad, but I love my friends, so it's possible that your friend has one or more similar reasons why she doesn't text you first but it doesn't mean that she loves you any less. She could also be nothing like me but maybe have other reasons for not texting first such as she's busy. Understandably, always being the one to initiate conversation is draining and can be worrisome, so you should talk to your friend about it. I would maybe say something along the lines of, "Hey, I've noticed that I'm always the one who initiates conversation between us. Is there a reason for this/ Is there something going on? I know that we're good friends, so I'm just wondering what that means." |
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Knots_EM
Bracelet King
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4 years, 5 months ago by Knots_EM
I understand why you may worry, but I wouldn't. Like others said, I think it's just a case of them maybe not having enough to talk about or they are just busy. If you want to talk, maybe facetime, that way you feel like you are having a proper conversation and you have a bit of social interaction.
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ejnagel
Bracelet King
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4 years, 5 months ago by ejnagel
it could just mean she is busy. she may have other tinged to worry about and maybe she just doesn’t know what to talk about 🙁
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Shelly2121
Bracelet King
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4 years, 5 months ago by Shelly2121
Some friends can be really great, but not be very confident. They might feel like they shouldnt text first, and that you should be the one. Ask and talk a bit about it, and wait for a response, then youll know waht the issue is!
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BandGeek22
Bracelet King
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4 years, 5 months ago by BandGeek22
@m3rmaidv ok yeah I was wondering if there is someone out there that just doesn’t text and that makes sense thank you 🙂
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BandGeek22
Bracelet King
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4 years, 5 months ago by BandGeek22
@Shelly2121 @ejnagel @Knots_EM ok thank you guys so much 🙂
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CoolKnot
Bracelet King
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4 years, 5 months ago by CoolKnot
I am that person a lot. I tend to get nervous and wouldn’t know what to say past “hi” so I tend to not text people first. I would say talk to her and it’s most likely one of the reasons one of us has mentioned ^^
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BandGeek22
Bracelet King
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4 years, 5 months ago by BandGeek22
@CoolKnot ok thank you 😊
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Shelly2121
Bracelet King
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4 years, 5 months ago by Shelly2121
Your welcome!
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_giraffe
Professional
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4 years, 5 months ago by _giraffe
maybe she just isn’t as good at starting conversations or doesn’t love txting
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ajmacleay
Professional
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4 years, 5 months ago by ajmacleay
Don’t worry, the same thing was happening to me. I had a group of friends who weren’t texting me for a while, so one day I texted them and we had a good conversation so everything was good. Also if you’re only texting that one friend maybe you could talk to some of your other friends instead and then talk to them again in a couple days. I really hope this helps since I know what it’s like to be in your situation.
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BandGeek22
Bracelet King
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4 years, 5 months ago by BandGeek22
@ajmacleay yes thank you 🙂
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kateb159
Skiller
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4 years, 5 months ago by kateb159
I used to have this problem with my former best fiend. We aren't as close anymore because we drifted apart. But don't overthink it, and maybe just talk to her about how you feel. Most likely nothing is wrong.
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