CHEESE CULT
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BabyWren12
Bracelet King
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2 months ago by BabyWren12
I STARTED A CHEESE CULT AT MY SCHOOL ON MONDAY AND I HAVE FORTY TWO MEMBERS WANNA JOIN I GOT A TEACHER TO JOINWhy join the Cheese Cult? A persuasive essay A brie(f) history As someone with a passion for cheese, creating a group with the sole purpose of enjoying cheese passionately was a simple idea with a simple goal that I believe can be accomplished easily, but to do that I needed to first find the right audience, and Gayle is the perfect target. Full of easily molded youths who already put themselves into dynamic groups based on cliques and who enjoy cheese, the classroom was a golden place to start. So I did. Me and two of my friends founded the Cheese Cult on 9/23/24 in Ms. Jones' 2Y geography class and immediately began spreading the word of our cult. Hold on, CULT? Though cult may seem like a harsh word when describing a bunch of minors enjoying cheese, after careful thought and consideration I decided it was the right one. After all, a cult is a group of people with religious veneration and devotion towards a specific figure or object, in this case, cheese, that others often find strange, even though we're just a group that cheeses to celebrate our passion for cheese! And considering how the modern-day cult also often carries connotations of desperate devotion, willingness to do anything, and a mild amount of sinister intentions, this fit my dream cheddar than a glove. A group or club would not have the amount of willingness or loyalty that the Cheese Cult requires, and they would both seem like activities perpetrated by school, a building that limits our cheese consumption. Sinister intentions?! What do you do in the Cheese Cult? Sinister intentions might be an exaggeration; I don't plan on committing my first crime until I've built up some gouda karma with the government, but I need people to back me when the time comes and to eat cheese with me. Also to anyone who is lactose intolerant or doesn't like cheese, we are DEFINITELY a threat. But aside from the possible rebuilding of America (which includes redoing whatever monstrosity American Cheese is), it's mostly talking about cheese, eating cheese, and having fun in a group bound by something stronger than diamond, cheese. I’m still not sure Here are some pros and cons! Pros: fun group of people! Cheese! No demon-worshiping activities, unlike other cult options! Cheese! Evangilizing the entire population of Gayle until it is renamed the capital of the Cheese Cult! Eating cheese! Cheese-eating parties! Cheese sampling! Charcuterie boards! Cheese! Cons of NOT joining! If you still want to be in a cult, a lot of others will attempt to sacrifice you. No cheese eating, parties, charcuterie boards, or cheese sampling. Possible demon summoning! Gayle stays a boring middle school. I will send people to hunt you down until I eventually win and we will force you into cheese hell while you mourn your decision. No cheese! I will personally stalk all nonbelievers! I guess I’ll join then... Grate choice! Welcome to the Cheese Cult! We promise that we will make your life feta than ever! I am now your queen but don't worry, I am not a tyrant and I have a lot of experience running cults! Go evangelize some people! Eat cheese! And get excited for the upcoming crowns featuring our mascot, Julius the Mouse, being distributed!! FOR LEGAL REASONS THIS IS ALL SATIRE I WOKE UP FEELIN THE CHEEZIEST |
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lizp18
Advanced
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2 months ago by lizp18
omg sounds amazing i wish i went to your school
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martha9999
Bracelet King
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1 month, 4 weeks ago by martha9999
wut is dis??????????
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maxbraclet
Bracelet King
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1 month, 4 weeks ago by maxbraclet
It sounds fun
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o_murphy
Advanced
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2 weeks, 1 day ago by o_murphy
🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀
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doezknotz
Bracelet King
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2 weeks ago by doezknotz
Im joining. CHESEEEEEE
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Cow29
Bracelet King
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2 weeks ago by Cow29
Im dying at the cheese puns 😂 😂 😂
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skytech
Skiller
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1 week, 5 days ago by skytech
🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀
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skytech
Skiller
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1 week, 5 days ago by skytech
I❤️ CHEESE
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BabyWren12
Bracelet King
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1 week, 4 days ago by BabyWren12
@sytech @Cow29 @doezknotz @o_murphyCHEESSSEEEEEEEEEE |
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KuteKat
Bracelet King
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1 week, 4 days ago by KuteKat
🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀
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Amara13__
Skiller
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1 week, 4 days ago by Amara13__
🧀Can I join?🧀
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Cow29
Bracelet King
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1 week, 3 days ago by Cow29
@babywren 12 can I join?
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Cow29
Bracelet King
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1 week, 3 days ago by Cow29
@BabyWren12 Look up
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BabyWren12
Bracelet King
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1 week, 3 days ago by BabyWren12
@Cow29 @Amara13__ @KuteKatCHEESE I MADE A CHEESE PATTERN BWAHAHHAHAH #179076 btw u don't have to ask to join just lmk |
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