Forum - Community - toxic team members

xc2024

Professional

2 years, 8 months ago by xc2024

i’m a high school xc and distance runner, and one of the younger girls on my team is pretty mean, however the older girls love her bc her older sister was a crazy good runner before she graduated and they were very close with her. she tends to single a few of us out and say rude things to us, yet after conversations with the coaches, they won’t do anything. not gonna get all into it but just today we were doing 400m repeats, and her and i were put in a group with 4 other girls to pace together. she’s like “hey it’s getting a bit crowded here, (my name) you should go a few seconds ahead of us”
also today, it’s 65 degrees where i live (perfect weather) and prior to practice she was giving me a hard time about wearing a tank top, after we warmed up she said and i quote, “do you really think your that fat that you can’t take your shirt off?” to me. i already have some issues mentally so this isn’t helpful, and it’s just small comments like that every day, but it’s to the point where i will run the opposite direction if i see her coming towards me on a easy day, and never wanna go to practice cause of this. ik i just have to deal with it, but anyone got any tips for that?

senor

Bracelet King

2 years, 8 months ago by senor

tell your coach. where i live, behavior like that can result in being kicked off the team. don’t confront her because she seems like the type to only get fueled from a fight.

Denver

Bracelet King

2 years, 8 months ago by Denver

@senor good advice, have you talked to your parents about it already? I assume they can help you

weirdkiddo

Bracelet King

2 years, 7 months ago by weirdkiddo

I have a kinda similar situation. I’m a golfer, and all the varsity girls hate me because I’m good and because one of the girls on varsity has a little sister on JV with me and they want her to be moved up instead of me. They all say rude comments to me and try to put me down and tell me I’m not good. One of them is in my English class and she always is rude whenever I answer a question. But I can’t do anything about it because my coaches don’t care. All they care about is if you play good or not. Now, if your coaches aren’t like this then I would suggest telling them about the problem. Teams should be like a family, not toxic. And body shaming is definitely not ok.

xc2024 Professional	2 years, 8 months ago by xc2024 i’m a high school xc and distance runner, and one of the younger girls on my team is pretty mean, however the older girls love her bc her older sister was a crazy good runner before she graduated and they were very close with her. she tends to single a few of us out and say rude things to us, yet after conversations with the coaches, they won’t do anything. not gonna get all into it but just today we were doing 400m repeats, and her and i were put in a group with 4 other girls to pace together. she’s like “hey it’s getting a bit crowded here, (my name) you should go a few seconds ahead of us” also today, it’s 65 degrees where i live (perfect weather) and prior to practice she was giving me a hard time about wearing a tank top, after we warmed up she said and i quote, “do you really think your that fat that you can’t take your shirt off?” to me. i already have some issues mentally so this isn’t helpful, and it’s just small comments like that every day, but it’s to the point where i will run the opposite direction if i see her coming towards me on a easy day, and never wanna go to practice cause of this. ik i just have to deal with it, but anyone got any tips for that?
senor Bracelet King	2 years, 8 months ago by senor tell your coach. where i live, behavior like that can result in being kicked off the team. don’t confront her because she seems like the type to only get fueled from a fight.
Denver Bracelet King	2 years, 8 months ago by Denver @senor good advice, have you talked to your parents about it already? I assume they can help you
weirdkiddo Bracelet King	2 years, 7 months ago by weirdkiddo I have a kinda similar situation. I’m a golfer, and all the varsity girls hate me because I’m good and because one of the girls on varsity has a little sister on JV with me and they want her to be moved up instead of me. They all say rude comments to me and try to put me down and tell me I’m not good. One of them is in my English class and she always is rude whenever I answer a question. But I can’t do anything about it because my coaches don’t care. All they care about is if you play good or not. Now, if your coaches aren’t like this then I would suggest telling them about the problem. Teams should be like a family, not toxic. And body shaming is definitely not ok.

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toxic team members